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*screams and carries on*

Goodbye, Eaaaarl...


Mar. 25th, 2001 12:46 pm
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Wooooo... this isn't going to flow along cohesively, because I'm dancing around to my new CD..

I got the Miss Congeniality CD! Hurrah! So cool.

Friday was the District Choral Festival. We got a 1. Again. Thankyou, thankyou. Heh. Naalti and I kept leaving to check out the.. uh.. bathrooms. Yeah, that's right. Then half of us were in the cafeteria, and Weiler came in and informed us that everyone else was waiting on the bus.. oopsies!

I changed my room around.. got rid of the old antique bed for a lower, wooden one. I got one of those long, smooshy body pillows - SO COOL! Hehe. It's fun to play with, and I sleep up against the wall, with the pillow on the other side. Fweee..

Y'know, something FISHY is going on.. Ange? I think you're right.. it stinks. I wonder why she won't go.. interesting. Time will tell.

Pump pump pump it up!

Oh, I like this one - None of your Business by Salt n Pepa:

Now who do you think you are
Puttin' your cheap two cents in?
Don't you got nothin' to do
Than worry 'bout my friends? Check it...

Hehe. I really like the Red Venom song on here too.. and all the oldies. But anyway..

Yes, that's definately odd... *looks at away messages* Definately. Strangish.

I'd really like a pet ferret.. oh oh, and look in my profile for pick-up lines. There are some funny ones in there. If a guy used them, I'd be so impressed by his sense of humor he might actually have a chance! But Naali and I decided guys have a thing about Prep girls. *snicker*

K, that's enough.. I'll write more tomorrow. Ciao, Dahlings!

(Caaaaahloos, daaahling!)


Mar. 22nd, 2001 07:40 pm
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Woohoo... Choir Districts tomorrow, so I only have two classes. Which, by all unholy curses, I happen to have a test in. But at least we get to watch the green-tinted nakedness movie in French. Indeed.

Oh, and I have to get the Miss Congeniality soundtrack...
"You're one in a million, you're once in a lifetime, you helped me discover why there are stars above us.."


"Well she's all you'd ever want,
She's the kind I'd like to flaunt
And take to dinner
She always knows her place
She's got style
She's got grace
She's a winner"

Look, someone wrote a song about me.. *waits for laughter* Oh.. guess that wasn't funny.

Anyway.. I have nothing to say, heh. Had a very boring day, read a funny conversation (Yeah Ange!), moved through classes like a marble through Jell-O.

Speaking of Jell-O, I found this online. It's also in Wood's profile:

"There are easier things in life than finding a good man.. nailing jell-O to a tree, for instance.."

And I totally agree. Although my grandma called and I had a good old bitch, informing her that I had several irons in the fire. She called me a slut. I'm so proud.

Disclaimer: My grandma and I are on the same wavelength. It's amusing that we talk to each other this way.. heh. Don't be shocked.

And so on.. lessee... erm.. Hi? :) People asked me to update this so.. I did.. against my wishes! I told Mr. Fremuth he looked suave today.. *maniacal laughter* And Cristina was in my group for English, so I let her do all the work.. speaking of Cristina, Christina, Beth and I are auditioning another Alto for the quartet, seeing Ash can't come. So, if you sing Alto, are in the choir, and go to CD, come see us!

K, I'm gonna run. Ciao, baby!


Mar. 21st, 2001 06:50 pm
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Results of my tests? 88 on Math, 98 on French. Please, no applause. :)

Di found out a dirty little secret and was rather pissed for most of the day. Well, not pissed, just kinda upset. /I/ found out something highly, highly amusing that I can't WAIT to divulge. Heh.. heh.. heh.

*twiddles her thumbs*

With or without you... Friends is sad today. An old rerun, where Ross and Rachael break up (which could be any rerun at all).

Okay, I'm leaving. Absolutely nothing to do except RP, which is fun.

Oh, oh! I had my 3rd course Hep. B shot today. I'm such a brave girl, I didn't even get a bandaid! But now I have to go to the bathroom, so I'll tie this up.

At first I was afraid
I was petrified
Kept thinkin I could never live
Without you by my side
And then I spent so many nights
Thinking how you did me wrong
That I grew strong
And I learned how to get along
So now you're back
From outer space
I just walked in to find you here
With that bad look upon your face..

And I forget the rest.. :P
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Hehe.. Angelica and I just bitched about our three most hated people. Hurrah. And hey, it's my journal. I can swear if I want to. You have a problem, don't read it.

And.. such. Ange wanted me to update but I really have nothing to say, heh. I had two tests today, and gave a speech. I'm pretty tired. Turns out Ash can't come to S/E, so now we're not sure what to do... eh. Dinner, finish this later.

Righty-oh then... *cracks her knuckles* So.. found out some funny stuff today. Mean, but funny. Snapped at a few people because I was fed up with their crap. Had fun in choir, although got in trouble when it wasn't me being bad. Damn.

Lunch was good...

Had a math test, french test, verbal footnoting speech... and so on. Got 23/25 on my biblio, which was good.. Ehe..

*runs away*
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Ai.. people can be /so/ immature sometimes.

I fell great.. like a huge burden's been lifted. I'm free for the first time in years.

A song that I just /love/ right now is "Hope You Dance" by Leanne Womack. Here are the lyrics, if you want. It's beautiful..

Ain't that a purdy graphic? Here's the site I got it from, all the songs are presented like that:

Anyways, gotta run. School tomorrow!
Luv ya!
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Woohoo! What a day.. let me recap..

I woke at 9.. rolling around on the floor. I've been sleeping there lately because I've outgrown my bed. Ai. Sunlight was streaming through the window and I thought "Oh, holy mother, I've overslept". So I jumped out of bed and took a running leap at my watch, only to realise that I had almost 4 hours until Angelica was picking me up.

Now reassured, I slipped into the shower to play with my moldable, orange bath foam. While dancing to the radio, I was tossing it around until... SPLAT. It hit the ceiling. And stayed there. So I danced some more, almost killing myself as I nearly slipped. Multiple times. I washed my hair thrice before crawling out, looking like a prune. I dressed and blowdried my hair before settling at my computer and listening to a few musical selections.

Diana arrived, then Angelica came and drove us to Somerset. We beelined for the foodcourt and settled down with our lunch. I spotted Mark, but when I looked back he'd disappeared. He later turned up with Di, so that was alright. After eating, we headed up to the Hudson's end and trawled our way back, cackling, etc.

Anyway, fun was had by me, at least. Dunno about all.

I was talking with Amanda about love and Love, the latter of which I am highly afraid. My analogy is this: Once you're in Love, it's like being tied to him with a rope that's been lit on fire. If you stay together, both of you will be burned. If one escapes, the other is left tied to the fire. Lovely. To be avoided at all costs.

Anyway, now I'm watching Futurama! Joy! And making graphs for chem.. ugh. Exactly /which/ one is due tomorrow?! Two labs.. not sure which is due. Oh well.

Yours in dangerous cheesiness.
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I totally forgot about St. Patty's Day. So have a happy one. Even though there's a grand total of.. um.. 51 minutes left in it.

Some song lyrics I relate to lately:

I'm a bitch
I'm a tease
I'm a godess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel under cover.
How do I get back there to
The place where you said
I want something else
To get me through this
Semi-charmed kinda life
Yeah, and I want something else
Not listening when you say
Promises are like
Little Diamonds
Promises are like
Little hearts you make
To give away.
I thought you'd want them back someday
I kept them for you anyway
Cos I know when I've been given
Hard promises to keep.
Remember the first time
We met each other
You were in your world
And I was in mine
Breaking down the barriers
We broke all the rules
But wasn't it good...
Wasn't it fine?
While I took for granted
You took your time
Longing for love, oh how we tried
It's over now, that's understood..
But wasn't it good?

Now it's late. I'm going to bed, d'you hear?
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Angelica yelled at me for not updating this. I didn't think people actually READ it! Okay, recap of the last month.

Lent started, and Wood gave up candy. I thought i might give something up and, as III was pissing me off with his relations with Wood, I decided to give him up! Therefore, I didn't answer any of his IMs, etc. Yes I was stupid, I don't need that pointed out. People yelled at me, and I considered talking to him again.. but, out of sight, out of mind. That, and he'd blocked me. It hurt to talk to him, it hurt to heard Wood go on and on about him, so I shut them out of my life.

I grew more and more miserable, and my parents asked me what was wrong. It hurt to talk about, so I shut them out, too. I refused to let them see me eat, and resorted to spiriting food from the kitchen to eat in my room. Eventually my parents took me to the mall, sat me in a restaurant, and forced me to talk. Everything came out, about how lonely I was, how much I hate people. So I started to let people back into my life.

Then things took a turn for the worse again. Wood admitted she liked III, and for all I try to act like I'm over him, I snapped. I screamed at her one night, blaming her for being so naive and for trying to take him from me. Then, of course, he IMs me to say hi and to ask what's wrong. I lie and say nothing, that everything's fine... Then he said that I could IM him when I wanted to talk, and "if it's worth anything, I was considering asking you to my prom in May, but now I don't know..".

For a moment, I just stared at the screen. Why? Why did he do that? Why does he do anything? I felt terrible, and I started to apologize.. I don't know what's happening now. I talk to Wood, but things are uneasy. I talk to him, but we avoid the topic.

What else has been happening...? I won a box of Swedish Fish! I found a leprechaun in the drink machine at school, making my total contests won equal to 1. Hehe.

Still quiet on the western front where romance is concerned.

I went and saw the opening night of the school play, "The Good Doctor". HILARIOUS! Dev, once again, worked his magic on stage the way no other can, and the duet between Quinton and Brooke brought tears to my eyes! Diarra was fantastic in both her scenes, and Beth brought a new facet to the part I wanted so badly. Rafi, you were right, the voice you do is hilarious! "Aha, I do.. tingle all the time". *cackles*

Anyway, tomorrow I'm off to the mall with Di and Ange, to drive the shopkeepers WILD. Rrrrowl!

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Guys suck.

No, it's not "cleared up", fool, I just don't want to deal with it!

Mrrmph. We have a Veeble tourney today till TEN THIRTY PEE-EM tonight! AHHHH!

Oh, and I have a new IM SN. It's BexieBSexie *cackles* Mwahahaha.. Seeeeexxxiiiiiieeee... you are getting very sleepy.. you want my sexy bod..

Naalti's laughing.

We're at school, cos Veal Schnitzel (Weiler) didn't come in today. Again. Bastard.

Not that I'm upset about this.


As you can tell, I am seriously over-tired and unwilling to cooperate. Please leave a message after the tone. It just took me five times to type "Please" correctly. Sheesh..

And... Rollin'... Rollin'.. Rollin' on the River... or whatever that last word is.

Oh wait, wait, how FUNNY is this.. my advisor actually NOTICED that I've been a little, um.. DOWN lately, and started prodding around for answers... about a WEEK ago my English teacher noticed, so I told my advisor that and she's like "Oh, it's good that she cares, huh?" and inside I said "Unlike YOU, BITCH!"


Trying to decide who to send Flowers to for Bastard's Day.. Valentine's Day to you sappy looooove FREAKS.. FREEEEEAKS! I will eat your first-born child! AHHHHHHH!

My eyes are burning. Must sleep. Ciao.
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Sometimes I run. I run until I can’t feel it anymore, until the rhythm of my bare feet on the cold concrete becomes the rhythm of my scarred heart in my aching chest. Sometimes I want to lie down and cry until I can’t cry anymore, until the rivers of tears blend into oceans, into seas, into a deluge of feelings that I can’t control. Other times, I scream. I dunk my head under the water and scream until a thorn rips through my throat and I can’t scream anymore.
Then I fall. I fall hard, and fast, and my emotion has no safety catch. The backlash from the years of torture and shredded hope comes back and slaps me across the face. The consequence of my actions from years passed magnifies and forms a huge, expanding ripple effect that rocks the boat of life. All the images that jump from magazines and TV screens that try to brainwash young adults into thinking that love equals peace and happiness, that love functions as an escape from the darkness of the world.
Over the last two years, I can say that I have learned my lesson. I learned that if I didn’t have friends, I wouldn’t have anything. I wouldn’t exist anymore. Every time I border on the line of insanity, every time I collapse in fits of crying, I can count on my friends. They never make me feel like I have to expose myself to them. They just listen to what I have to say and try to help me. They don’t probe for more details for their own knowledge; they take only what they need to understand.
I‘ll never forget the time that I needed my friends the most. A while ago I worried that I had bipolar disorder: my moods would swing from one extreme to the other and I thought about death a lot. My life was out of control and I often appeared to suffer from a teenage schizophrenia. I lost myself in daydreams and could change from one person to another in a matter of seconds. Now, don’t worry, hormones took the blame (of course), but it had me very scared and my friends had no idea how to help me. They didn’t realize that just being there helped me through one of the toughest periods of my life. Without their quiet, unobtrusive input, I would go insane. Because of their own experiences with this stage of life, they can offer advice to help improve my life, in hope that one day I will use their advice to help someone else.
I know that we’ve had confrontations. We’ve lived through a lot together in the short years that I’ve lived here and every moment is engraved in my memory forever. From screaming fights to mock battles, from troubled looks to bottled feelings, everything has always worked out for us. Through negotiation and compromise on everyone’s behalf, I feel that what doesn’t make us truly hate each other can only make us stronger, and I hope that they feel the same way. Although a thoughtless word can hurt more than the most lethal missile, my friends and I really think about things before we say them. Each one of us takes literature and language very seriously and we all know the power of words. We carefully monitor a person’s feelings before offering advice, in case, in their fragile state, advice from a voice of reason would only make things worse. By keeping a close watch on all the people whom I hold dear, I feel that I’m always ready to lend a helping hand.
So, in order to tie this seemingly senseless ramble together, I’d like to thank all my friends for just being there and being themselves. I know that if I fall into a recession and lapse back into my depressive side I can always count on them , the helping hands that reach out of the darkness and pull me to safety. I just want them to know that when they jump, I’ll catch them and when I snap, I expect them to come and visit the insane asylum. Best of all, when I’m happy, my friends share the happiness with me, and that symbolizes the truest love.

Moving on.. Today came close to one of the worst days of my life.. I NEVER cry in schoo, EVER, and today I did.

Did he think I wouldn't find OUT?! Did he think he could go on using me until I just wasted away? I'm dead.. I'm just emotionally dead right now. When Ellen told me, in Speech today, everything SHE knew.. I tried to look like I was fine, but when I got to Choir I broke down and started sobbing. And it continued through the day. I got home and Mum asked me what I did at school today, and I broke down again, but this time I wailed. She had to give me a Tylenol because I was making myself sick from crying so much.

I'm not so much angry as embarrassed. I let him USE me! I should've left the first time.. God, I feel like such a fool. And after I'd just told him all that stuff! I could cry again, now, just for the sake of my own pride. *sigh* I'm such a miserable failure..

But I don't blame Di.. I don't blame Ellen.. it had nothing to do with them. In fact, I love Ellen even more right now because she was a true friend, when I thought she betrayed me. She blocked him, she wanted nothing to do with his underhandedness. I never understood why she hated him so much and now I do. What a BASTARD..

So now I have this big thorn in my throat and it hurts.. it hurts a lot. And there's nothing I can do but sit this out.. again. Alone again. But for good this time.
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Funny things happen when you OD on lipgloss and chocolate. For instance, you start thinking about the way the heart and mind coexist and feel compelled to write about it..

I think that when you're ready to fall in love, you do. You can't choose who, or when, or why. You just do. And you love that person just because. And it seems like everything in the world would be fixed if they would just love you back.. but how often dows this really happen? Um, never. Not in MY life.

I also LEARNED that you can't run away. Ever. You can try to avoid them.. you can ignore them. I hated him, and the whole time I wasn't talkign to him I tried to come up with excused to IM him. I couldn't help it. All the crying, the swearing, the raging against the evils of mankind.. only to be weak again.

I learned that you can't do anything about it. You just have to go with the flow and if it's a rip tide, you're fucked. Excuse my language. And you can float out to sea and drown and never be happy again, but y'know what? That's the way it works. And times trickles slowly by while you're a) trying to decide if you really DO like him or b) denying you ever thought about him in the first place.

I learned that being in love SUCKS. It's like having constant PMS. You don't know what you want, you don't know how you feel, and you can't escape. And while you love the guy, you hate him for doing this to you, because now you've lost control. You can't escape, you can't make him do anything.. you're in his hands. And if he doesn't know, he might drop you, like a glass bottle, and shards of you, or what used to be you, will fly everywhere and never be whole again.

Oh, sure.. life goes on.. but there's always something there. There's always the first love. And GOD, may he be a total LOSER, you'll still love him..

This isn't directed at ANYONE, so don't flatter yourself by thinking I'm talking about you.. it's just what I've seen, what I've understood.. it's just what I'm writing down for future reference, y'know..

Peace. Not love.. that's contradiction.
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Woohoo.. had to add s'more shtuff.. I was bored and the chocolate sauce is raiding my brain. Ahhhhh!

I've gone all girl-powery now and I'm listening to Get Another Boyfriend. Enough of that sissy love crap I was carrying on with before. We all know it's not really like that, right?

Dumdedumm.. K, Mark wants me to talk about him now. Wait.. he has to tell me what to write first... Waiting... waiting.. shyness is a curse, dear... Poophead. Well I'll talk about him anyway.. let's talk about up north.. It's about time the whole story got out anyways. Oh there.. he said to tell you all he's freaking hot. I disagree. Not hot, cute. But on with my story.

Lessee.. it was my first summer in America. I think.. Musta bin. K, and I dragged my friend Diana up north.. no, wait, this is boring. Well, it all resulted in Diana and I fighting over Mark, but she eventually settled for Larry cos she liked his hat. Go figure. It was a cool hat, I guess. Soooo...

I had not part in this! I was trying to drag her back.. but she walked downstairs and asked the guys if they wanted to go for a walk.. along the beach at sunset?! Was she INSANE?! K, so we went on this walk, up to the big rock at the end of the beach.. we made a big fuss about not climbing it, the guys tried to coax us up, we refused.. we walked back. This is all very romantic and such.

THEN, we had a big watergun fight. That was the guys' turn to be.. well.. guys. And I fell. Hard. I guess someone just comes along at the right time, you're in the right place, you're ready to like someone. For real.

A whole mess of stuff happened.. it was all confusing and I get things mixed up so I'm not going to post them here in case I'm wrong. But there was a big... thing.. and I acted like I didn't care. Teenagers do that, I learned. One day in 8th grade (completely unrelated to this) I just broke down in my English class.. I started bawling.. and my teacher said something interesting. He commented on how teenages can act like nothing is wrong until a simple word sets them off and all the walls fall down.. that happened to me.

I didn't talk to Mark for about 6 months.. I forgot, I guess. I hated him for a long time, then I just felt bad, then I.. forgot. *shrug* Here comes the interesting part.

Hah, we went up north again.. Mark was supposed to be in Spain. Or that's what I was told.. I was walking back from the Putt-Putt place with my icecream (Barb, Larry and I had gone to get them) when we meandered past Mark's house. Who the HELL do you think was in the driveway, washing the car?! I was SO shocked, I dropped my icecream, grabbed Barb, and we ran. I guess I wasn't ready to see him there. It was all a big fuss, really.. it was fine, after.. I spose. Apart from the gummi bear incident.. *blushes* I have to confess that that was ALL my idea.. I bet Barb she couldn't stick a gummi bear to Mark's face.. She took the bet.. *chuckles* She lost. It fell off.

But now he knows.. now you know.. lol, not big secrets. Just girly obsessions. And dropped icecreams.. it was a turtle sundae, too.. I'll get him back for that one. For not being in spain, that BUM!
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Donna Lewis
I love you always forever

Feels like I'm standing in a timeless dream
Of light mists and pale amber rose
Feels like I'm lost in a deep cloud of heavenly scent
Touching discovering you
Those days of warm rains come rushing back to me
Miles of windless summer night air
Secret moments shared in the heat of the afternoon
Out of the stillness soft spoken words
Say say it again

I love you always forever
Near and far closer together
Everywhere I will be with you
Everything I will do for you

You've got the most unbelievable blue eyes I've ever seen
You've got me almost melting away
As we lay there under blue sky with pure white stars
Exotic sweetness a magical time
Say say it again

I love you always forever
Near and far closer together
Everywhere I will be with you
Everything I will do for you

Say you'll love me forever
Never stop never whatever
Near and far and always and everywhere and everyhting

I love you always forever
Near and far closer together
Everywhere I will be with you
Everything I will do for you
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Ola.. no exclamation mark, hehe..

So I have lots of homework to do.. I forget why I decided to upsate this. Just to get thoughts down so I remember to go over them later, I spose.. That helps me a lot, actually. If I don't write down everything I'm thinking right now, I'll go insane.. and, seeing my IM away message is up, people might look here and find an answer to their question.. :)

Starters.. Mark, I love the song, hehe. It brings back heaps of memories, I remember when it was popular in Aus. I like the part about the eyes and arms.. it's pretty. And I downloaded the other song I was talking to you about and I just figured out what it's about! Maybe that's why you said you don't like it.. oh well.

*sigh* I'm sitting here, staring blankly at my math assignment sheet and wishing it would burst into flames. I hate it... hate. it. so. much.

Feels like.. I'm standing in a timeless dream.. of lightness, of pale emeralds.. feels like.. I'm lost in a deep could of heavenly scent, touching, discovering you.. Those days..

Bah, I'm in A Mood. Not anything in particular, just.. A Mood. Feeling sappy, happy, depressed, romantic, hyper, dramatic.. everything at once. This is what it is, huh naalts? You were right allll along.. all of you. Amanda, Naalti, Di, EVERYONE, I'm sorry for not listening.. Will you help me now? Help me get out.. I don't like this anymore. It was fun.. until I lost control.

I'll add to this later.. I HAVE to do that work.. it helps bring me back to earth.
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Mmm.. teehee... life is sweet. So is my lipbalm.

Lessee... I had an all-day volleyball tournament on Staurday in which we KICKED ASS! We played SO well! We tied SCS once, then played them out past 15 in our next set with them. The only other games we lost were against Notre Dame! Eeeeeee, we are SO GOOD! And Mark came, which was GREAT.. thanks for the support :) And Amanda and I ended up having a fistfight because we couldn't pay attention.. hehe.. but she won because.. *cough* Anyways.

Then.. I went and saw Snatch with Mark. All you crazy people who say you can't understand Mickey (Brad Pitt) are insane.. he's SPEAKING English! Just fast and with thick Irish slur. I understood every word.. when I wasn't drooling over the boy himself.. the hair.. the eyes.. *swoons* Ahh, but which boy am I talking about? *cackles*

Anyways, today (Sunday) I went to Great Lakes, then Hannah n Min's swim meet, and now I'm home watchin' TV! I also get 20 bucks from my math group for working a tutorial we were all sposed to do.. life is very sweet, hehehe!

Well, must run.. Ciao!
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What a mother of a day... *rups her temples* Eesh.. Here's what happened..

- Di's a little late to pick me up, so while I'm waiting I go and give the dog some fresh water. They pull up while I'm doing that, so I don't have to time to grab money for lunch tomorrow. D'oh.

- I forgot my gym shoes and had to wear Daria's at VBall practice.. no problem, but her feet are two sizes smaller than mine.

- Had the second part of the chem test.. *flinches* Owie..

- I found out that people aren't as innocent as I thought they were.. a bunch of kids in my grade are involved in bad stuff... *sigh* Idiots.

- By the end of the day, I was SO pissed, and I had choir last. Wood, Hanks and Olga were being MORONS, and I don't care if they read this.. they deserved to get in so much trouble, but they're all Weiler's favorites so of course.. *grumbles* But I was in a pissy mood, so don't take my word for it.

- The mother of all pissies... Reports came.. *bitter grin* So now my 'rents are threatening to cut off the net. Fun. NOT. How will I ever talk to my friends? Especially the ones I don't see at school.. I mean, they're even more special-er.. Bah, tired, son't get on my case about grammar.. heh.

So now.. I downloaded a bunch of songs from Napster (African spirituals - High notes are good stress relief. Equivalent of screaming, but it's "art"!) and I'm sitting here screaming them at the top of my lungs, even though I have no voice left over from vball :)

Well, good stuff DID happen today, believe it or not. I got my laptop reimaged and it's SO much better now! I got to redecorate everything, which was fun.. heh heh. And volleyball.. well, we kicked ass! Di, Ashley, Wood, Keggy.... you guys rock! YAY!! We won!

Anyways.. if anyone wants to come to our volleyball tournament on Saturday, from 8:30am-2pm at DCDS, please come support us! We'd love to see you there, entry is only three bucks :) Have a heart.. we need you!

And that's all for me.. too tired to go on.. Will write again tomorrow!
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My life (in a nutshell) right now? Cedar Point!

I'm sitting here listening to music.. I'm actually in a good mood (who knew I could be happy?! lol) and I just want to sing.. really.. loud!

"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you"

Bwahaha. Anyways... listening to music, as I said.. here's my day -

School was okay, actually managed to pass my math quiz! All my breaks were spent harrassing Wood and being lectured by my venerable friends.. hehe.. and having them force me to make up my mind. We ended up having a mock screaming fight in the middle of the PAC, and Diana threatened to punch me... *snickers*. Then I got home, no VBall today which is nice.. and I took a Chinese Horoscope test which had freakily accurate results.. If I sent it to you, do it, if you want it, email me.

Anyways.. that's me right now... hehe, IM me! I'm in a GREAT mood!
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Just checking if my changes will.. y'know.. change.. I'm going for the black and red deal here. Gargoyle-ish, I think.. y'know?
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Okay, the title sounds like the name of a kindergarten book. "My First Birthday" or something.. no wait, that doesn't work.

Okay, to warn you all. I'm going to use this space for my endless rambles.. stuff that happened today, points I'd like to argue out, etc. There should be a constant updated list of my crushes.. or not, because there's a link to this page in my profile and wandering eyes might find it... *evil cackle*

Today? Today was... vague. Nothing was really defined. Wood's been talking to III which kinda unnerves me.. jealous, perhaps? Nah. I wish we talked more often, that's all. I miss our 15-page rambles! But it's alright - as long as she tells me what's going on as it all seems to go over my head.

I have an English paper draft due tomorrow that I just COMPLETELY BSed... I really don't care right now. And I have my poems for the competition, which I will post here simply for reference's sake.. y'know:

Maybe if you cared?
If you dared
Dared to tread so softly in the footsteps of the past.
Nothing that you’ve shared
And everything she’s bared
Dare you reach out, hold her, so the memories will last?

Maybe if you tried
Have you cried?
Can you share the sorrow she feels when you turn and walk away?
Feel the injured pride
Watch the falter in her stride
How can you leave her hanging, waiting for another day?

Speak the silent thought
Redemption isn’t bought
But it’s something you achieve when you unfurl a hidden soul
Love was what she sought
Now she’s swinging, caught
In the web of lies you spun her as you hid your invisible goal.

Try to break the spell,
Risk, and snatch her up from hell.
You know that what you say is something she’ll try to avoid
Signed a scroll and fell
Naught but her soul to sell
And she tumbles from our realm into a never-ending void.

*prays* Please let my HTML work! Ahh.. oh, and the other one I can't be bothered posting right now. Maybe next time. Anyways, I gotta go.. talk.. mwahaha. About Woody's bisexual shorts and III's obsessions. Tolo!
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